Eid Mubarak!!

Salamualay'kum!!
Eid Mubarak to all... Semoga syawal kali ini membawa seribu erti khususnya dalam perjalanan kita mencari redha Allah s.w.t... ameen!
Muhasabah Ramadhan lepas... markah teruk..kalo digrade based on PNG memang below 3... wuuu! Seperti kata my husband : " masa yg free tu membunuh!"... betol! flashback zaman di universiti, dengan kelas from 8 a.m to 5pm, assignment yang berlambak, program tarbiah yg terancang dan berjadual, tanggungjawab dan komitmen yang pelbagai... masa x banyak di bazirkan..(melainkan pada waktu yang betul2 free..)... tetapi walau se'busy' mana pun... sme kerja beres.. Now, sangat banyak masa free sampai jadi 'blurrr'... free sampai dah x tau nak buat ape.. sedangkan sangat BANYAK benda boleh n perlu buat!!! aiyo! So, senang cite ramadhan kali ini prestasi tidak cemerlang..sobb2! Tidak boleh menjadikan alasan morning sickness, penat dan sebagainya sebagai alasan... tapi tu la siapa suroh manja2!!! Belajarlah dari kesilapan wahai diri...

Sedar2 je Ramadhan habis... sekarang sudah syawal... sangat pantas masa berlalu.. Raya kali ini sangat berlainan! Raya kali ini 1st time beraya :

• tanpa family di sisi (sangat rindu!!),
• dengan suami tersayang (xde la sampai nanges rindu family..terima kasih kepada suami..:)
• pregnant.. sebelum ni x de pon beraya n pregnant...haha!
• luar dari Malaysia... (dah la tanpa family,.. huu) tp pengalaman beraya di new zealand sangat berharga!
• amik gambar banyak2 (bukan tradisi keluarga kami untuk bergambar beria2 di hari raya...haha!)
• tak dapat makan masakan ma...yang sangat lazat (preggie mom yang sentiasa craving!!) Rendang, ketupat palas, nasi dagang, tapai, roti jala,... agugugugugu...
  

apa2 pun... memang raya ni tetap best walaupun bersedih (terutamanya kerana Ramadhan yang tidak dimanfaatkan sepenuhnya..)... Pagi2, bersiap untuk solat raya, kena naik bus baru sampai... masjid jauhhhh... kalau kat Malaysia masjid ke surau ke.. semua walking distance..
Sampai masjid... MasyaAllah! Penuh!! dewan utama (muslimin n muslimat) penuh dengan muslimin sahaja... muslimat kena guna dewan serbaguna... dan saya selaku orang yang lambat.. solat di dewan makan2... tak pe..asal solat raya! Yang bestnya, time solat sme cam jeling kiri kanan...since lupa step2 solat especially part takbir tu... ngaa... biasalah, dah solat raya setahun sekali.... Khutbah raya sngat bersemangat tp sayup2 je dengar..since ramai lagi yang seronok2 bercakap (ye la... maybe jumpa pon sekali setahun..bila da jumpe berborak sakan la...).

Habis di masjid, kami beraya di rumah orang kemboja (namanya Nawawi), x pernah2 kenal orang kemboja nii... tapi since suami kenal so isteri kena jadi pengikut setia laa... (best x ade husband?haha.. jangan jealous.. :D)... Nawawi ni dah lame tinggal kat new zealand, pernah menetap di Malaysia (so tau sikit2 la bahasa melayu..)... sampai rumah dia, isteri dia sambut.. kami bantai makan la (keluar awal2 pagi xsempat breakfast..lapar!).. yang penting disini makanan diorang lebeh kurang je dengan makanan Malaysia cuma versi lain sikit...
Bihun goreng die cam lutsinar sket, rendang die manis, lepat pisang, kuih koci, roti canai petak, puding karamel kering(biasa makan yang berair) dan banyak lagii... ape2 pon bantai jela...
yang best lagi... geng2 se'kemboja' datang... and selama ni x tau pon ramai kemboja muslim.. so i asked them.. memang ramai kata mereka... MasyaAllah!! x pernah2 berkenalan ngan orang kemboja... dan seronok bila jumpa mereka beramai2... Perasan x? selama ini, di Msia kita di kelilingi oleh pelbagai kaum dari pelbagai negara n yang pasti tanpa berkenalan kita x tau mereka seakidah dengan kita!! Allahuakbar!... dan mentaliti kita selalu meletakkan orang indon, kemboja, bangladesh or senang cite..pendatang asing ini sebagai warga kelas bawahan (pandang pon x mau)... Padahal, pakaian takwa itu lebeh Allah pandang dari pakaian bangsa, pangkat dan sebagainya....

Balik dari rumah kemboja, kena rush.. suami ade test tengaharinya... aiyoo! raya pon ade test ke? Hari raya disini..student x dapat cuti...kesian kan...
pas habis test... kitorang sambung jalan2 raya ke beberapa umah... yang pastinya.. ikut husben..so raya pun rumah kawan2 husben la.. n konvoi2 sorang je wanita yakni diri sendiri.. malu2 tp ade husband yang berkepit xpela...
2nd rumah raye ialah rumah pojie selepas buat makan2 di rumah sendiri.. yang penting diorg hidang lodeh... mak aihh..pandai pulak budak2 ni buat..tapi alhamdulillah orang masak kita makan... xde la mengidam sangat lepas ni... dari Rumah pojie ktorang sapu dengan si pojie sekali pergi rumah hazim... yang best dirumah hazim adalah kerepek2 malaysia (pisang,bawang, udang) and kerepek oversea yakni chips... haha! best! sebab sebelum ni ade craving nak makan kerepek pisang yang nipis gituu... alhamdulillah! setakat ini dua benda dah lepas: lodeh and kerepek pisang...
ini cerita 1st day raya, habis di rumah hazim kitorang sme balik ke rumah masing2... Esokkannya, kitorg bercuti, dok umah je..tggu org datang rumah.. seb beq ade rendang Haq... kitorg x keluar shopping pon untuk prepare open house.. masak ape yang ade..and ala kadar... yang penting ukhwah n silaturrahim mesti di bina.. kann???

hari raya, part makan2 tu jatuh ke tangga ke berapa... yang penting time raya la kita nak ikat ikatan yang sedia ada supaya lebeh kuat... n membina ikatan2 baru... ikatan disini ialah ukhwah n silaturrahim sesama saudara seakidah yang ikatannya jauh lebih kuat dari ikatan darah sekali pun...

yosh!! pergunakan hari raya ini untuk membina & merapatkan silaturrahim...

"Siapa yang ingin dilapangkan rezekinya dan dipanjangkan usianya, hendaklah ia
memelihara hubungan silaturrahim´.(Hadith Riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim)

dan yang lebih penting adalah masa untuk bermaaf-maafan sesama saudara samada di atas kesalahan yang disengajakan mahupun sebaliknya.. atau yang disedari mahupun sebaliknya....

“Jadilah pemaaf dan suruhlah orang mengerjakan yang makruf, serta jangan pedulikan orang-orang yang bodoh.” (Surah al-A’raf [7]:199)

Dalam ayat lain Allah berfirman:

“…dan hendaklah mereka memaafkan dan berlapang dada. Apakah kamu tidak suka bahwa Allah mengampunimu? Dan Allah Maha Pengampun, Maha Penyayang.” (Surah an-Nur [24]:22

Jadi, di sini saya mengambil kesempatan untuk memohon ampun dan maaf kepada keluarga n sahabat handai, kepada para pembaca jika ada salah n silap sepanjang perkenalan kita di alam realiti n di alam maya....

I'm Pregnant!!

Guess what?? I AM PREGNANT! and now it's almost 11th week of pregnancy...am still may not look pregnant to onlookers and that makes me a little bit frustrated. However, being pregnant at a very young age is a bless from Allah s.w.t, am now 23 years old and i'll become a mother at the age of 24...InsyaAllah! And on top of that, my parent will have more grandchildren..and more later... :D My little one will become their 18th grandchildren and that's for sure will bring a lot more fun and endless happiness to all.I've been married for 79 days now and we are both happy and our little one will strenghten our love..insyaAllah.

About a week ago, I had an appointment for an ultrasound procedure which cost a lot of money. My husband accompanied me to the Pacific Radiology Centre and it's just 5-10 minutes away from home. That's my 2nd appointment after previous consultation with the doctor. And I had to pay almost 90 NZD just for 20 minutes consultation, which at the end only prescribed 0.8 mg Folic Acid supplement, handouts/flyers on pregnancy, and futher procesures to follow. I'm started to feel lucky to be Malaysian, which I think you only have to pay RM1 for all. Ok, now back to the Ultrasound procedure, although it's veeeery eexpensive but i think it's worthful. The procedure confirmed that my pregnancy already at 9th week by measuring the foetus size(not sure how they do that though..). The wonderful thing is.. i saw the 'tiny guy' inside my womb is kicking and punching, and that makes me burst into tear. It's just soooo lovely and you can always say 'SubhanAllah' every time you see it... here is some pictures that i wanna share..


the heart beat.....the 'little one'... but i'm sorry you can't see him/her kicking/punching in this picture.. :D

You may wanna now... How big the little guy in this picture.. based on the ultrasound procedure.. the foetus was 28 mm long (that's about an inch) or about the size of a large grape. And weighs less than one ounce at, but will soon start putting on weight dramatically later on. And now, our little one is growing larger and larger as the pregnancy continues week by week. By pregnancy week 11 our baby should be big enough to hold in the palm of our hand which about 1.6 inches long and weighs almost .25 of an ounce. We could see right through the skin. Our baby's skin will remain paper thin, but soon it will become a multi-layered membrane and lose much of its transparency. By this point in time, our little one should be able to open and close his or her fists, and little buds are forming in his or her mouth that will eventually develop into teeth!

By pregnancy 11 weeks, our baby's fingers and toes have lost their amphibious-like resemblance, now they are separated instead of webbed. Our little one is taking advantage of the huge space she is floating in by kicking and squirming about. Just by knowing this fact i felt blessed!

Talking about baby's development, am also having my own journey of changes.. started from the 1st month of pregnancy, I don't feel that am pregnant at all. But the morning sickness started as soon as am entering the 2nd month of pregnancy. I don't know how to describe the conditions, but you know... symptoms like fatigue, dizziness, nausea, vomitting, headache.. and not to mention complex emotional disturbance. And who'll get all the tension? My husband of course... :D

I ever had blood vomiting as the consequence of forceful vomitting. And it;s not a pleasant experience to tell, I ate a lot that night due to Break Fast invitation (of course i had multiple meal at that time!). There's something stuck in my throat that made me coughed and strained the blood vein which caused the blood to burst out. The undescribable throat pain cames after i vomitted all the foods in my stomach, the saliva production increase and am hardly swallowed. It;s painful and it took me two days to get my throat back to normal.

Now, since it;s almost end of the 1st trimester the morning sickness started to say 'good bye' and my appetite goes up!! After few weeks of improper nutrition, dehydration maybe...and loss of appetite.. I regained! Not to mention that, I had few pounds loss... wish to get my fat back... :D

Fasting while pregnant is a very adventurous journey of mine... especially for the 1st timer like me. Some mention that 20-30th week of pregnancy is the best for fasting, and am fasting during 1st trimester. It's ok to fast if it's not harmful to the baby and the mother, and alhamdulillah am managed to fast till now. However, I hadn't fast for 4 days (1 day due to Ultrasound, 1 day after blood vomitting, 2 days of intolerable fatigueness) which I have to replace it after Ramadan.

I think that's it for now.... a lot more will come.. insyaAllah!

a very loooong way to go...

Salamualay'kum....

Lame tak menjenguk blog yang tak seberapa ni... i don't even know how to start... so many things to talk about... and am sure some of you must be waiting sooo long for a new post to come out...before i made a very looooooooong introduction.. let me start with a little wish to all of you...
I wish all the muslims...: Ramadan Kareem..! Blessings of Allah on us..insyaAllah...
hope this ramadan would be better than last ramadan... ameen!
Last post, i invited all readers & viewers to my wedding ceremony... & it was more than two months ago... Time sure flies so fast that i still trying to accept the reality..that am now a married woman... & the most wonderful thing is... am going to become a mother.... SubhanAllah! My husband keep on asking... like... 'Dear..do you believe this really happened to us?..or ' uci/sayang..(opss!).. percaya x? sekarang uci dah jadi isteri orang?' thanks to him.. i WOKE UP afterward!Marriage is a solemn and sacred social contract between bride and groom...and the contract is a strong covenant (mithaqun Ghalithun) as expressed in Quran 4:21... That's the reality...

Yep! Frankly.. it's not easy to just change your status from 'single' to 'married' which comes together with new responsibilies and commitments without having any problems to adapt with it.. The most essential things are.. to acknowledge the purpose of marriage(at the very beginning!) and the duties & rights of husband & wife after marriage....

I loved to quote some of the hadeeths that advices to wife:
1) Anas reported God's messenger as saying, "When a woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of paradise she wishes (in other words nothing will prevent her from entering paradise)." [Mishkat].

2) Um Salma reported God's messenger as saying, "Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise." [Tirmidhi]

3) Abu Huraira told that when God's messenger was asked which woman was best, he replied, "The one who fills [her husband] with joy when he sees her, obeys him when he directs and does not oppose him by displeasing him regarding her person or property." [Mishkat]

MasyaAllah... it's sounds easy for woman to enter jannah/ heaven.. but yet! why there's more women than men in the burning hell? O' Allah.. let me be a good & obedient wife...let me die when my husband pleased with me at most...& we really want your blessings to guide us to what You like most! Ameen ya Rabb!

~UNDANGAN KE MAJLIS PERKAHWINAN~

salamualay'kum... sahabat sekalian..

Sahabat-sahabat di jemput hadir ke Majlis Perkahwinan di antara Nur Ilanah Abdullah & Zaid Mohammad Nor.

Tarikh :19 June 2010

Masa :11.00 pagi-6.00 petang

Alamat : Lot.607, kampung Bukit tanah, 16810 selising, Pasir Puteh, Kelantan

Kehadiran & Doa Restu dari para hadirin saya dahului dengan ucapan terima kasih.

Kepada sahabat2 yang jauh diperantauan/kesibukan dengan urusan yang pelbagai/mengalami masalah2 yang membutuhkan komitmen dan sebagainya... Kehadiran doa sahabat2 memadai.. (T.T) insyaAllah, tambahan lagi alamat sudah diberi (tertera diatas)--> apelagi pos la hadiah kurang2.. hehe! Just kidding.. InsyaAllah kita dipertemukan di lain hari...

Kepada sahabat2 yang sanggup mempertaruhkan masa, harta dan mungkin jiwa untuk menghadirkan diri di majlis ini, saya alu-alukan dan berbesar hati. Mungkin untuk sahabat yang diluar kelantan sukar mengenalpasti alamat rumah, saya sarankan sahabat2 menghubungi saya seawal mungkin untuk 'konsultasi'...hehe! kelewatan mungkin mengakibatkan ketidaklayanan..ngee!

Akhir kata, sahabat2 datanglah beramai2 untuk memeriahkan majlis. Moga dengan kehadiran kalian bertambahlah keberkahan majlis ini.. InsyaAllah!

"Ya Allah Ya Tuhan Kami, Kami mohon restuMu, berkatilah majlis ini, Limpahkanlah berkat & rahmat atas pasangan suami isteri ini, Kau jadikanlah rumahtangga mereka aman & bahagia dalam ketaatan terhadapMu, kurniakanlah kepada mereka zuriat yang soleh & solehah serta berikanlah ketenangan & kemudahan kepada mereka didunia & akhirat. Sempurnakanlah agama mereka dengan ikatan perkahwinan ini~ Amin ya Rabbal Alamin~

Not only with books..

when it comes to learning process.. some of our mind pictures the book out of anything else.... for students, parents and even whole society.. should start making the transitional views of this... i always remember that our primary school and even secondary school teachers reminds us to read books when its holiday... well..it's an established effort..

the main point here is.. how to navigate the variety of ways or methods in searching and delivering knowledges... wise say,... for it to be more creative and effective as well...

at some point.. we always thought only being a bookworm can make us bright... ngee! not always..

we might find that todays generation accepting knowledges in various ways.. which then makes the older generation especially parent needs to speed up in educating their children...

owh..ila! stop mumbling.,.please! actually.. i'm on my way to finish watching the newly-received DVDs from reader's digest.. entitled Adventures in Search of the Past... it enclosed three DVD which have different chapters.. I had finished one of the chapter on Mysteries of the orient-Ancient Journeys... another two chapters are Mysteries of the Europe and the Mediterranean-Myths and Legends, and Mysteries of the America;s-Vanished Civilisations...

Some how.. being a Dietetics student.. I don't think I just need to limit my knowledges within the dietetics and nutrition fields.. Other knowledges might needed whether indirectly or directly..

it will make out the character of ourselves and the way we thinks...

sounds like promoting... yes! I am promoting all of us..including me... to love and search knowledges.. just like what Prophet Mohammad PBUH told and taught us...

belows..some snapshots i wanna share.. which might will encourage us...

Reflection...

Today is the day I chose to write my post in Microsoft word which I never did before… coz it’s not my personality by being careful and cautious in my writings or even in what I am doing… I always prefer doing something recklessly.. everything for me is just a piece of cake… No wonder I wrote in regretful manner…

I am sure..that all of you don’t really know what I meant.. Somehow, you also might feel the same way but don’t know how to express and describe the feelings… me either.. Maybe end of this writing, you won’t find what exactly the means of this writing…

I made a lot of thinking about myself in 23 years.. and to be more precise ‘22 years 3 months and 17 days’… Have you ever asked yourself on how good you are in your living… what’s your achievement.. what is actually you gained in so many years of life.. all this while.. is it worthwhile? Or is it full of misery? and to be more relevant.. did I or did us… ever asked whether we able to set our ‘foot’ in heaven with all the good and bad things we have done before?

So many questions coming out of my head and it made my hairs stand… but I have to move on and find the answers… It’s seems like I’m in a race to unlock a code.. or maybe to untie the tightened ropes… it’s not a piece of cake anymore….

I don’t know the answer too.. but I’m so sure about what I should do… or at least I try to do… First, I have to think deeply and put myself in the ‘reflection room’.. and for me.. I prefer to think about myself and reflect on my deeds while sitting on the praying mat after night prayer (I’m feel sorry to myself.. coz I rarely do it..).

When the ‘ropes untied’…. It is compulsory for me to seek for the solution in order to keep it untied …. Am I able to find the solution? What if I am not? What if I am able to find the solution but don’t know how to start it?? Now I started to hate ‘What if’ questions.. coz it make me mad of unsureness…

I just hope someone can slap me hard on my face… But no one ever did… I ever slapped myself several times..but it doesn’t work as I wish… I need to come back to the reality….. and have a long sight on my purposes of life.. I had made myself dragged away by the strong current called desire… I need someone to hold me and pulled me away from it… it is shameful asking for someone’s help when you have to do it on your own…

Life as a platform for us to do as much as we afford to please Allah the one and only…

Life as a garden where we can plant good or bad crops which we can harvest later …in the Day of Judgment….

World is a big stage… where we are the protagonist.. and it is our choice to perform good or bad play….

The judgment day is a sure event that everybody will participate… no one excluded… it is our vital point of what our life really is… whether in heaven or hell…

So..let’s seek for Allah s.w.t forgiveness… let’s go back to the where we belong…

Today is better than yesterday..

The title above seems so hard to be true... at least for me..
salamualay'kum.. sahabat... yes! i'm back.. but i don't know how long am gonna stay... when i reviewed my last posts... i'd concluded that.. there's so much irregularities... and inconsistency in my writings... firstly, coz I don't have concrete reasons for my writing... and even I have one.. i don't really hold to it strongly that i wouldn't fall apart or flying away from the point! secondly, i didn't post regularly & consistently which then made my post started and ended wrongly... 3rdly, I'm not really good at writing.. and blogging is one of the way or medium that i can express my feelings toward myself or anything else...

I feel so bad about my own blog and at the same time... i feel a bit relief that i'm still able to write a post today... at least i can put my 'junks' here... ngee!

Around one month i left this blog... so i don't know how to start... can i juz write about my experiences here???yes... you can..write whatever you want...

on 16th Jan i started my clinical attachment in Raja Perempuan Zainab II Hospital... everything went really well.. except for few days of stress & intolerable! The only thing that's not going so good is my 'Iman'...well...since there's no 'usrah' along with the workloads which made me a little bit disarray....the ignorance & unawareness worsened the situation... I'm feel sorry to myself... But i'm grateful that I'm able to attend a 'usrah' here even with different 'naqibah'.. i felt recharged some how...

We all know that... when our soul were deprived... the same went to our performance either mentally or physically.... we can feel the significant different when our soul changed.. we'll be so stressful... or maybe suddenly feel sad even we don't know why we sad... we treat every work put on us as a burden... think and interpret every single things negatively... so...and so...
It seems like the negative charge or aura were surrounded us... without we realized it...
Talking about the physical consequences... we might feel so tired even after doing simple job... we also feel exhausted... feel really weak and disenergized... or maybe when we prick the needle to our finger..it feel like we stabbed our chest with the knife...
you may think i'm exaggerting... but that's how i feel... & people always be different in any sense.. In conclusion, so many negative thing will be when our weak soul enfeebled our mental & physical health!

To keep our performances either mentally or physically keep in escalating trend... don't you think we should be able to keep our soul strong and healthy as well..
since I'm a muslim... i should alarm myself on the importance of keeping my faith strong and unshakeable... but that's so hard to keep if we don't have friends around to remind us.... our family to scold us.... and even our naqibah to monitor and encourage us...

so...Thanks to all..who help me in 'managing' my soul whether directly or indirectly...